


A Domestic Trip to Target

by shikaku28



Category: Marvel (Comics), Young Avengers (Comics)
Genre: M/M, References to Drugs, Slurs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-07-06 13:28:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15886983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shikaku28/pseuds/shikaku28
Summary: Trans-Tommy looking a bit more feminine than usual and Billy/Teddy’s not there to go into protective sibling mode so Noh-Varr has to do it.





	A Domestic Trip to Target

Tommy will never not do laundry again. Curse Billy, whom he blames for this current predicament. Even though the other practically begged him to do it three times a day for the past week. Even though Tommy was the one who waved it off with the usual ‘Later’. Curse him anyway.

Tommy’s crawling out of bed with a low groan, the movement and noise dragging Noh into a bleary state of almost consciousness as well. They both were on autopilot before their brains even knew what was happening. Noh had pushed himself out of bed running a hand through his hair and fumbling for a pair of boxers to cover up with. Tommy was shimmying out of his side, trying and failing to stand a few times before finally leaning against the wall to right himself at least temporarily.

Of course they had gone clubbing the night before. Of course their hands ended up down each other’s pants halfway through with heads full of alcohol and bodies full of music, instincts taking over. Though shame on them for having been grinding 85% of the time, of course they fucked like there’s no tomorrow. The alien had practically torn Tommy’s clothes off as soon as the door closed behind them to his apartment. “I’ve never slept with a male who’s had parts I’m familiar with,” He said and they both let out their own form of relief, Noh’s smile and Tommy’s exhale of a tense breath through laughter. 

So of course Tommy woke with a headache and an obsessive need to shut the sun off and keep Noh’s beautiful lips from opening. “Sustenance, coffee, drugs,” Tommy chanted in a voice oddly reminiscent of Billy’s as he dragged himself past the bathroom. Noh found himself in the bathroom splashing water on his face before he knew what was going on.

“Where’s the sustenance?? Where’s the coffee?? Where’s the drugs??” Tommy ran back to the bathroom at an oddly human pace, pushing past Noh-Varr in a frantic search. Though it’s mostly a push, partially a just-kind-of-smacked-into-him silent command to get out of the way. “What are-” Noh begins to ask and Tommy cuts him off. “I don’t have any food, coffee, or ibuprofen. I need to go to the store right the fuck now. Give me that-” He reaches past the other and grabs the large bottle of mouthwash, chugging the entire thing and it’s oddly in slow motion. The morning jitters start to return to Tommy but everything still seems at a drastically reduced speed. “I’m sure you can’t go out looking like that,” Noh commented on the fact he was still naked. “Not in the mood bug,” He stated but there was a small smile there.

So Tommy rushed back, finding 0 viable clothing in his closet. “What the hell? Where did all of my clothes go??” He seemed incredibly confused. The alien was left to answer the question by gesturing around to the room with many things strewn about haphazardly. One of which being multitudes of clothes. “I believe I found them,” He stated, joining Tommy in his closet soon after. “I wasn’t aware you had this array of wardrobe Tommy,” The alien commented. Inside was a few skirts and dresses, hanging around. Tommy never kept them with the intent of wearing them, they were just maybekindacuteokayshutup.

“And as far as you’re aware,” Tommy shoved him out, “I don’t.” Tommy took longer than usual to get dressed, tripping himself up a couple times, wiggling into the small skirt. When he stepped out of the closet for Noh to admire he felt a bit uncomfortable, but he’s only going to the store for a few minutes what’s the worst that could happen?

Noh picks up on the discomfort, looking down at him. “Where’s the rest of the fabric?” His fingers brush the length of the skirt, particularly over his ass. “The skirt is short on purpose,” Tommy huffs, folding his arms. “I see,” He responds, the hand not leaving his ass. “You are clearly less than comfortable in this attire,” He offers, “Why not simply send me to the store?” Tommy looks taken aback, “You in charge of shopping?? I might as well send you dumpster diving it’s practically the same thing. You’d probably pick up oxycodone and nyquil somehow thinking it’s food and get instant coffee instead of the real stuff and god knows what you consider human medicine. Oh no, we’re going to do this together. I’d do it myself if I wasn’t worried I’d pass out in the store. Hurry up get dressed I can feel my body burning through this mouthwash already.” Noh smiled and leaned in to kiss him, tasting the mouthwash with a grin. Then he pulled away to tug on the rest of his clothes.

They left without much of a hassle afterwards. Noh keeping a protective arm on Tommy in case he even thought of passing out. 

Much of the trip through Target was the speedster’s anxiety over visual presentation. Noh would often try to distract him by asking about all the things for sale, or offer up something that looked like one of the three items Tommy came to get. This would send Tommy in an explanation long enough to grab his attention for a few minutes. 

In a certain demonstration of a mop and broom versus a vacuum cleaner, Tommy bumped someone behind them who was passing through and they fumbled a pack of pens. “Hey,” He called looking rather miffed, but at Noh-Varr and not Tommy. “Tell your girlfriend to watch where she’s going next time.” Noh only returned the statement with a look of confusion. “I am sorry?” He asked, not in apology but in clarification. 

“Yeah you better be.” 

“No, I don’t understand-” 

“Noh just drop it.” 

“I am here with my boyfriend, Thomas.” He gestured briefly before wrapping an arm around his waist again as if it belonged there. The man tsked in disgust. 

“Not with that ass she’s not,” this seemed to amuse him and he began to continue down the aisle before his shoulder was grabbed by the alien with a rather heavy grip. 

“He,” he gripped a bit harder to emphasize, “And you will address him as such.” Tommy was tossing himself onto Noh’s shoulder in effort to calm him slightly so as not to cause a scene in the Target aisle of household cleaning apparatuses. 

“Please bug boy it’s not worth it. Let’s just go he’s just an asshole and I’m dying as we speak.” Noh only turns a bit to address Thomas. 

“This harassment will not be tolerated. I’ve punched assholes for less,” he grins a bit then turns back to the patron, “You will apologize for being an asshole. You will tell him he looks very nice in his outfit today. Because he does. You will never comment on another person’s body unless you have explicit permission to do so-” The man’s grip had been pulling at Noh’s firm hand for some time. 

“And what if I don’t,” He challenged despite the fingers gripping bruises into his skin and ego. At this Noh lifted him easily off the ground. 

“Then you will have much time to reconsider your decision from the hospital.” 

“Noh oh my god-!” Tommy pulled at him now but was stifling a laugh. 

“Alright alright I’m sorry!” He squirmed and tried to kick at the alien but it seemed to have no effect. 

“Not me, him,” He pulled Tommy closer who was blushing furiously and looking rather abashed. 

“I’m sorry I’m sorry!” He squirmed and Noh looked over. 

“Does that suffice Thomas?” Tommy appeared to consider it for a moment, “Y’know I…” He started to speak but his stomach reminded him he was a man on a mission. 

“Yeah that’s good enough Noh, we gotta go,” the tugging continued. “Very well,” He dropped the asshole and they ambled off. Noh heard something mumbled under his breath and Noh was back in an instant, gun pointed. Tommy was only aware he was gone when he heard a scream. 

“Noh-Varr!” He yelled, not used to not being on the other end of such an accusatory yell. The other was back quickly. 

“I didn’t do anything,” He said quickly. 

“I heard a scream.” 

“Yes I’m sure he soiled himself.” He shoved the alien with a slight laugh, “Stop it you’re going to get the Young Avengers called on us. Hurry up and find me some real food to eat.” 

They continued around the store and Tommy found himself leaning against Noh. He looked a bit drained and Noh scooped him up in his arms. 

“What are you doing roach?” He asked but didn’t protest further almost grateful for the assistance. 

“Oh it’s so nice to see guys still doing things for girls out there,” They heard shortly following and the culprit seemed to be an older couple, pushing a cart with a couple of kids. 

“I’m sorry,” Noh interjected, stepping in front of them, “But this is a boy.” He showed Tommy off proudly with a smile. 

“Oh,” she seemed suddenly taken aback and embarrassed. “Mommy! I wanna wear a dress too,” Her little boy piped up looking at Tommy with the biggest smile of excitement and Noh watched Tommy almost match the enthusiasm. 

“No no no,” She said in a hurried whisper trying to detour the cart around them. “No ideas like that now, I don’t want you to end up like-” The alien stood in front of the cart with a dangerous expression now, both Tommy and the little boy visibly deflated. 

“Would you care to finish that sentence?” It was a rhetorical question. 

“Are you threatening my wife?” The husband attempted to make himself seem larger and more intimidating. 

“Are you insinuating in a city of gods and aliens who fight regularly, your son in a skirt is the worst thing you could witness?” Noh set Tommy on the edge of the cart to sit, the two boys playing with the skirt around his waist. 

“We are trying to preserve a wholesome family, safe from the likes of-” 

“Iron man?” 

“What??” She turned her attention to Tommy who now spoke with some authority. 

“Iron man bought me this skirt. He has a really nice dress selection. Thor and I dress up regularly.” The kids eyes were wide with stars. 

“You’re lying,” she squints but falters ever slightly.” Noh-Varr was already displaying the pictures on his phone to see. 

“Read it and weep,” Tommy grinned, “Speed and my alien warrior Marvel Boy. Nice to meet you.” He was talking to the kids now, holding them close for hugs. Noh took a picture.

When they were finally on their way again and acquired all the items they came for they were making their way through the register line with an inordinate amount of food- so much so, that Noh-Varr had to find a cart for them. In addition, ibuprofen to sedate an elephant and enough coffee to last a year. Or three months with the way Tommy drinks it. 

They’re finishing up at the register and the timid looking androgynous employee muttered a soft comment about liking Tommy’s skirt. This brightened Noh’s demeanor compared to all the incidents trying to get through the store. 

“See Thomas, I told you you looked wonderful.” The smaller simply rolls his eyes with a small smile, unable to really afford much by way of conversation close to passing out. They made the mistake of thinking they were home free when a comment from a senile patron behind them muttered causes Noh to turn. 

“Would you care to repeat that?” Noh asked darkly. The employee pretended not to hear, just trying to hand them the receipt so as to continue on with their day and ignore the harassment that seems to just be tradition by this point. 

“Queers of a feather,” He said, standing up to the alien practically spitting the word. His fists clenched, Tom just tried to grab weakly at him. 

“I’m hungry let’s just gooo.” 

“The food is paid for Thomas, please eat. I understand you all place value on human life so they can grow and make mistakes and learn from them. But I have encountered invaders with more respect and courtesy that I would rather bow to than to spend extensive time dealing with such a close minded race. Who would rather murder their own people through words and actions, than accept something they cannot change. They are more comfortable interacting with aliens, robots, hostile threats to their own planet and forces of nature, than my boyfriend’s decision to put on a cute skirt.” 

Tommy, unable to resist, had begun to dig into a bag of chips, steadily regaining his head and his speed. “Noh,” He insisted, taking the receipt and and not looking towards the elder giving them trouble who seemed to be trying to come up with a retort. “Let’s just go.” With a frown he nodded and followed Tommy towards the exit. 

Back home where Tommy has shoved one of every item of food they’ve bought between four slices of bread and devouring it so fast even the alien roach had trouble keeping up, Noh was taking a call from Teddy and Billy. The two were joined at the hip. 

“Why on Earth are people complaining about being threatened at gunpoint in a local Target?” They were asking or something along those lines. 

“I… don’t know what you’re referring to,” the alien squints though he was a terrible liar. 

After trying to disentangle a mangle of voices and accusations the phone is flung from his hand as he’s tackled to the ground at a speed he’s familiar with. Lips are occupying his fervently and there’s fists gripping his shirt tightly. 

“Thank you,” Tommy sighs as they break to breathe. Somewhere in the back Billy’s small voice calls to see if they’re still there. 

“What’s the occasion?” He asks in response with an eyebrow raised. 

“Everything… Back there I mean I just,” his face flushes as he speaks. Noh cuts him off with a slow and soft kiss, it’s understanding mutual. Hands find their perfect place on his ass under the skirt again. 

“Any of us would have done the same. I would have done something similar for anyone. But for you I would go to any length.” 

“Well,” Tommy grinds down on Noh-Varr, “Let me reward you for your dedication.” Noh grinds back with a groan, flipping their positions a gasping moan leaving Tommy. 

“Ugh you guys are gross,” Billy can be heard on the phone hanging up. 

“Hah,” Noh-Varr chuckles afterwards, “I think we should perhaps do laundry first.”

**Author's Note:**

> I am not trans myself so if I portrayed anything wrong, do let me know!


End file.
